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I recently heard Prince Harry refer to ‘mental fitness’ alongside mental health.

The words totally resonated with me as I review the last 4 decades of my mental health journey.

Mental fitness is what’s required, it’s an endurance sport.

Before I reached my early 30s mental health was something for other people. Any reference to mental health in those days referred to someone who wasn’t coping.

By my early 30s I wasn’t coping. I felt sad to the point of depression and consumed by despair for fleeting moments of my day.

I began by addressing my lack of energy with a nutritionist which led to increased good quality sleep and the brain fog drifting away to leave me with a clarity I’d never known before.

I started speaking to therapists to unpick some of the issues hanging over my head and holding me back from reaching my potential. I’ve continued to do this on and off for a decade now.

Even with all my support systems in place, I later developed anxiety and once again had to return to the drawing board to figure out how to live on a daily basis with this new uninvited lodger! I was so disappointed to see it rear its head because I thought I had my mental health ‘sorted’ with a set of prefects keeping it in order!

Mental fitness – here’s my guide:

1) acknowledge something doesn’t feel right with kindness rather than judgement

2) make one decision, what are you going to tackle first?, is it your energy, finding a therapist, finding a personal trainer, talking to a friend?

3) monitor your journey, it won’t always feel like progress so don’t even bother using that word as it creates pressure to improve and mental health isn’t linear. Do this alone, I do this on a Friday night just after work and before going out for dinner. Write down how it feels even if it’s only a glass full, half full, quarter full or empty rating.

4) once a month review the last months ratings. What are the main themes? Do you need to change your plan of action? Mix things up a bit, get more help in one area? Now go back to number 1 and repeat the cycle.

5) Try slow and steady – in nearly everything I do, I’m the slow and steady one. The main feedback from friends is ‘your plan takes too long’. I agree, but when I try to do things quickly, I get exhausted, overwhelmed and stop. Actually, I usually crash and burn!  

Outcome:

All of the impactful things in my life started to happen as I gained clarity on my mental health and worked towards mental fitness.

The slow and steady process with a balance of priorities has seen me control my weight within a weight bracket I’m happy living with, triple my salary and pay off all my debt including my mortgage, change careers and continue travelling.

I’ve grown in strength with my mental fitness and even now when things get hard I have a robustness in habits which mean I can deal with sadness, grief, anxiety better than I could 10 years ago.

I learnt the art of practising.  Sometimes I’ve got this!, sometimes I really haven’t!, but it’s all a practise and I’m still learning so getting back up seems to feel easier every time.

If you’re reading this and have a feeling something isn’t quite right with you then just remember you’re not alone. If the physical people in your life aren’t able to support you then find your tribe elsewhere.  I really recommend Action for Happiness as a good place to start.